i dont know why but im like fucking jealous... im like fucking confuse and all....
went jamming with W.A.R yesterday and im officially in their band as a permanent drummer... whatever it is, i told them that i prioritise Ignified Sins and make W.A.R as a side band and they agreed.... so yeah.... hope to see W.A.R as an improvement to my drumming skills and a band thats going to cheer me up just like Ignified Sins do.... i just so fucking missIgnified Sins.. jamming with them is postponed to another week and that is going to be the last again as we going to continue as our mid-year..... so im just looking forward to W.A.R for jamming which is ones a week.... got to bear with that... after jamming, proceed fort canning.... hendra, my rhythmist is like starting to be unwell.... hug him all the way there as he is like having a hang over.... half way, switched with arep my vox... he drag hendra all the way to our destination with ika, arifin, my bassist, girl.... along the way, lemon was walking alone.... supposedly, i have no mood to talk to her at all.... but then, i encouraged myself to approach her... walked with her all the way to fort canning as she too is feeling unwell.... i feel like holding her hand or even hugging her cause i kept on recalling about the past... but then, i just controlled myself.... reached fort canning and just slack.... people are attending to hendra who is sick.... imran and acap disturb wan bogeh and lemon just sat down beside wan... accompanied her to mac and then back to fort canning... anwar kept on calling me so decide to make my way to meet the hellions battalion.. left my stuff all at fort canning.. sooner or later, all the rockers came to funan where im at with my stuff along..... after awhile, split with HB and went along with rockers to esplaned.. im all fucking jealous towards lemon.... she have been with wan bogeh all the way.... while hangging out, plus while walking to the mrt... im, as usual, left alone... punching metal boards here and there.... until when they went guardian, im left alone outside, she came to me only for a short while.. she asked whats wrong with me and all.. why i kept on punching the boards... nothing is what i said..... in the train, just sat on the floor, played my psp and mind my own business.... i text her in the train saying,"dont mind me asking but why you tak layan i sangat? as in besides just noe.. asyik bogeh jek.. thats what actually made me mad.." whatever she replied, i just cant recalled and dont want to recall....
today... never do anything.... woke up at 3 plus, ate chicken rice which parents bought, slept again till 8... watched tv all the way till now im in front of the comp.... i put my personal message at msn as 'im confused'.. she pm me asking why.... this is what i replied, "~=Siraj Kasturi®=~ prioritise to ~ıgиıfıeđ šıиš~ sides to ~=W.A.R=~ says:
i wanna be back with ya.. but you dont want.... im confused because i dont know what to do.. you have been treating wan bogeh so like specially which makes me jealous and too make me confused... i know if i were to tell you.. all you got to say is move on... people too have been telling me to move on.. but im still in for you... how am i to move on... i still love you b... i want us back but i know its impossible cause you dont... i dont know but i had that eeling that you going to accept wan bogeh if he were to sound you cause you both are like so close.... people have been asking me what about you and him and all i can say is i dont know.... im like embarassed when people asked me that cause they know that im close to you some how.. but come to the real story... im hurt... i know you dont even care cause you got nothing got to do with me anymore and just want to be my friend.... haiz.... i dont know la b.... "
this is what she replied, "aticcalemon♥ malam ini ku takkan pulang. says:
u tak faham ke u ? i've asked you to move on. just move on. be strong. anyways. you have alot of other girls in your contact perr. your ex pon ader. dayah ader . u nak aper lagi ?"
i dont know la.... i guess she and wan bogeh start to develop feelings for each other.. if you ask me, yeah im fucking jealous.... but............................................
~=Siraj=~
Siraj Kasturi [11:31 PM]
Profile
`SirajKasturi(:
01031991.
boohooooo.
banging drummer for Mercenarian!
`SirajKasturi(:
